Actualizado: 18 de abr de 2020
Four years ago I gave birth to my firstborn. Just like any new mom, I wasn't expecting lots of all the things that were about to come with the pregnancy and maternity. I thought that having a baby was something so natural that I was going to know exactly what to do… but it hasn't like that. I ended up following doctor's instructions blindly, with a terrible birth experience and a hard and painful recovery for no reason.
That’s why I decided that if I was going to have another baby, I was going to plan everything so my process could be different and I could get the chance to enjoy every step of my pregnancy as well as a fully natural childbirth… but our plans don’t always go the way we want them to. I had an excessive volume of amniotic fluid (polyhydramnios), my baby change her position multiple times, and the 40th week ended and my little girl didn’t wanted to come out, so my doctor schedule me for an induction with a high probability of a c-section.
I had to go to the hospital the day before of the procedure so they could give me some medication to help with the dilation, so I spend the whole night there. The next day, they gave me more medication to cause the contractions and they offered me the epidural before I even start having any pain. I was doing great so I didn’t wanted it, until the contractions started and suddenly increased drastically. I didn’t wanted to feel like everything was planned or artifitial. I wanted a real experience, but the pain was unbearable, so I ended up asking for the epidural.
At first, I felt like needing medical help to have my baby was a defeat, I felt incapable and extremely frustrated, and all just because I needed medicines. Lots of women experience those same feelings or even worst. Some women need to go thru painful procedures or recoveries just like the c- sections, complications with the babies or their bodies doesn’t allow them to get pregnant and they have to try other methods to have babies and I can’t imagine how any of that can make them feel, physically or emotionally.
After the epidural, the pain began to ease little by little. I felt the contractions, but not the pain any more. When it was time for my baby to come out, I was able to enjoy every single second of it: I was able to hold her without feeling like I was dying of tiredness, I fed her, I saw how my husband cut the cord and enjoy his happiness. I was present, and everything thanks to the medications.
“Don’t worry baby, there is nothing you need to prove”
Those were my husband’s words for me when I was crying in pain, and he was totally right. It might be true that the more natural, the better, but it’s ok if we need help. It’s ok to enjoy that we live in a time when the medical advances can make our live a little easier and in some way make us feel confident about our health and wellness. Some times it can even give us opportunities that wouldn’t be possible in any other way, but also they can simply help us to avoid unnecessary pain or discomfort.
Nature is perfect, and so are our bodies and every single mom deserves to feel proud of their own process, no matter the circumstances they had to go through to become a mom. Having a baby is a big responsibility, I would say that is the hardest job on Earth, but is also the best gift life can give us and having that tittle is something why we should feel grateful and fortunate.
Mommies, if you are reading me, remember: Forget about comparisons and frustrations. Your process is unique and while you keep doing your best, you are doing amazing!